what does it mean to be mindful?

The idea of being mindful is one that I've been thinking about a lot lately. Work has been very busy the past few months, and it's gotten to a point where I feel like it might just break me at times. Where I'm close to burnout, feeling discouraged in my abilities and overwhelmed with my responsibilities. And let me make clear that this is not a complaint, because I've been hugely blessed to have the job that I do, and I'm very, very grateful for it. The problem, I'm realizing, is not my job. It's me.
I think we spend a lot of our time and energy trying to control our situations. Trying to manipulate our surroundings, our feelings, the actions of others and the reactions of others. I know I do. Sometimes I make things sound more dramatic than they really are to get sympathy or affirmation. Sometimes I do things with a predictable outcome so that I don't have to feel uncomfortable. There are probably hundreds of small ways that I attempt to control my situation throughout each day.
But the more I attempt to control, the more things get out of control. And the more things get out of control, the more I feel discouraged, inadequate and exhausted, because I failed at what I had set out to do: exert control to keep life as easy, simple, and predictable as possible.
I've been reading through Psalms, and what's standing out to me day after day is that God is in control. And not only is He in control, but we can call on him every day for his wisdom and understanding. This is where the idea of mindfulness comes in. For me, the best way to let go of control is to be mindful of God's control. To be mindful of my surroundings rather than attempt to control them. To be mindful of my time. To be mindful of my efforts. To be mindful of what I eat. To be mindful of how I spend my free time, and how that affects my time at work. When something seems out of line in our lives, I think it's natural for us to isolate it and try to control it until it's "fixed," but if we approach all of life with clear eyes and God's wisdom, we can look more closely at why we act the way we do, and if the way we act is truly what God would have for us.

Test me, Lord, and try me, examine my heart and mind; for I have always been mindful of your unfailing love and have lived in reliance on your faithfulness.
Psalm 26:2-3

May we all learn to be a little more mindful.

xoxo.